Dear Minim Family,
Xuemin here, and I hope everyone is keeping dry this tsuyu season and having a great weekend!
Today I want to share an interesting phenomenon I have observed about teaching my own child, and I wonder if it resonates with you too.
Before I had a child, whenever I saw young students playing beautiful pieces on the piano with genuine joy, I would think: when I have a child, she will have an amazing advantage. We will practise together regularly, and she will thrive.After all, I had spent over a decade teaching hundreds of children. Surely I would be the best teacher for my own daughter, right?
Boy was I wrong.
When she turned 3, we hopped on the piano together and she was excited to learn. She happily spent time with me at the piano and completed her first recital playing a simple "Twinkle Little Star."
The next year was when things got challenging.
We moved on to the piano textbook, the same wonderful textbook we have used with all our students, and when it came to playing with both hands, the refusals began.
What should have taken 5-10 minutes sometimes took 30. Because 20 of those minutes were spent negotiating:
how playing with both hands is impossibly difficult...
how she is suddenly hungry (she just ate)...
how she does not know the notes (she does)...
and how piano always takes so long (it takes 5 minutes if she just starts).
We ended up taking a 3-month break, then returning when a recital was approaching. She managed to play a song with both hands on stage, and afterwards said she loved it, because she got to wear a cute dress. ^^;
From that point on, my husband and I agreed: she should learn from someone else. Not me.
We spoke to our daughter about it, and she was happy with the idea. Teacher Emi from our team was game to take her on, and we arranged for lessons to start the following month.
Oh my goodness. I could not believe what I was seeing.
When Teacher Emi arrived, my daughter was already at the piano. Book open. The very song we had argued over, every single time. She spotted Teacher Emi at the door, grabbed her hand, and said: "Look, I can play this song!" And she played it. Right there, within the first five minutes.
As I observed this from the other corner of the room, my jaw dropped.
They went on to have a wonderful lesson together. The pieces were reasonably challenging, and my daughter moved through the hour just like any other student would. She was practising her songs, learning a little music theory, doing some colouring, then returning to the pieces she had just learnt. The hour flew by, and she was excited to show me everything afterwards.
I could not believe it. I cannot teach my own daughter.
Someone else has to do it.
Under Teacher Emi's guidance, my daughter has improved just as I have watched so many students improve over the years. My role as her mom is simply to sit through practice with her 3-4 times a week before the next lesson arrives. Consistent lessons, reasonable practice in between, and the cycle repeats.
What I learnt
Entrusting someone else to teach your child creates a powerful learning system. For the child, it offers a change in dynamic, someone new to impress, a "guest" to look forward to. For parents and guardians, it creates natural accountability: you practise the lesson material together before the teacher returns. That rhythm is what drives progress.
Consistency matters. With a regular lesson schedule and manageable practice goals, her skills moved forward noticeably. In between lessons, we practise together before TV time or snack time, just enough to keep the material fresh before Teacher Emi arrives again.
From that experience, I stopped hesitating. It works every time.
She loved singing? We got her a teacher.
She needed to learn to swim? We got her a teacher.
Solid math foundations? We got her a teacher.
And now, English. She loves speaking and expressing herself in English, and she is eager to read. Helping her read and write with confidence will open up so much of the world to her. The Minim team is currently researching and trialling an English Academy, a Literacy and Reading program, and we are excited to launch it when it is ready.
My eyes were opened. It was never about me. Greatness comes from other people. All it takes is the right teacher, and that teacher is not me. It is someone else entirely. I am truly humbled.
Have you experienced something similar with your child? I would love to hear your story -- hit reply and share it, I would love to hear it! :)
Humbly,
Xuemin
